About Me

This blog is about me and my voyage to becoming a mummy. Ironically called “mummy in the baking” as together with my passion and obsession for all things cake related, I will never be able to have my own "bun in the oven." Years of fertility treatment have taken their toll and I now find myself on a new..eek, i hate this word...journey! The crazy train to adoption. I hope you will join me while I bake my way to becoming a mummy. I want this blog to be a source of information as well as a comforter. I hope it will inspire and help anyone who is considering adoption or who has in fact already bought their ticket for this..here I go again...journey. Cake makes me happy and I hope you will enjoy sharing my love of it. I want it to help lift your spirits and hearts through what can only be described as 'the trials and tribulations of the adoption process.' Along with my desire to be a family, I love my dogs, have an unhealthy love of sausages and chenin blanc, adore my land rover uber-nerd of a husband and continiously dream of balmy summer evenings. Baking in progress…..

Monday 19 November 2012

Life's Curve balls.....
Just when we thought this was all going so well, we are called into a meeting at work to announce that the whole company is on redundancy notice. We will all have to re-apply for our jobs. My job turns out to be fairly safe but to make matters worse, my LRUN's job (we work for the same company) has been re-located to a branch pretty fay away. Far enough away to involve lengthy commuting. We are both struck down with shock and dread having to tell Miss Delia. We cannot move closer to LRUN's new job, as this means we willl lose our entire support network we have spent so long pulling together. At the same time, if LRUN commutes, this will mean I will be on my own for alot of the time without his support. More importantly, the Adoption Services hate instability. Neither us sleep very well for ages, scenarios going round and round in our heads..what should we do, should we tell Delia? We haven't made a decision but we have come up with the plan to tell Miss Delia in our next meeting. The plan is to present it to her in a way to show her we are thinking it through logically and sensibly and are researching each option and the implications thereof thoroughly...rather than running around in a flat spin which it felt like were doing most of the time.  I wonder how many more curve balls life wants to throw at me. I can feel my dream of becoming a mummy slowly slipping away. I must be stressed as cannot face baking anything.

Tuesday 13 November 2012

Introducing Miss Delia....
The house is clean (all areas this time!) the dogs are hoovered, walked and treated up and we wait patiently. She is a little late and I spend the time reading a chapter from the Adoption Handbook on the Home Study to my LRUN to get us in the mood. This was a good idea actually as it totally relaxed us and put us in the right frame of thinking. I re-boil the kettle three times twice and re-arrange the cookies. I opted for irresistible double chocolate brownie ones. She's here! We argue about who should answer the door (our hallway is not big enough for more than one!) and in the end I do. She immediately reminds me of the legendary cook, Delia Smith. I will admit, I am a little disappointed when she declines my offer of cookies. This is not going to bode well. But she is just lovely and makes us feel totally calm and relaxed. She is here for nearly 3 hours and she talks about what the homestudy involves, the importance of the homework and we talk alot about ourselves. She has look round the house and makes endless notes and gives us a spot of homework.  We finish with booking some dates for future sessions before Xmas and wave good bye from the front door, both us beaming. I have a good feeling about this. Back inside, the brownie cookies are missing and the dogs are looking sheepish.


Thursday 1 November 2012

Let me introduce myself.....
I start carrying my phone everywhere with me in case I miss her call. Strangely the concept of her leaving a message just doesn't come into it. I don't want her to think I am difficult to get hold of. Does it really matter.....no...will that class me as a bad parent....no...so why am I doing it...? I honestly don't know. Maybe the fear of if I don't answer, the next person will and she will allocate her next available time to someone else and we will have to wait even longer? Miracuolusly, she calls and I answer! She sounds nice and friendly and we set a date....for 2 weeks time. I just say yes...again, i don't even check with my LRUN. Whatever we had planned for that day, I can tell you, is no longer planned. This is the most important thing ever...we have a date to start our home study. I wonder what she will be like. I wonder if she likes cake? Oh please let her like cake....