Last one in the pool's an Andalucian lemon......

I find myself in the kiddie section of that Swedish lifestyle emporium. I have been here before but this time feels different. I have a little man in mind. I'm a mummy on a mission. Every kid needs a crocodile shaped non-slip mat for the bath, right?
Back home I find Miss Delia has sent us the schedule for our week of introductions with LBM. I can't help feel that it resembles a script out of Big Brother. Monday, 9.30 am....read in a strong jordy accent....LRUN and MITB leave their house and head to LBM's house. 10.30am.....they take him out for a walk and return in time for lunch. 1.30 pm....and so it goes on. Hour by hour of northern LBM loveliness.

I dash off from work to attend a meeting with Miss Delia, the Fairy Godmother and Miss Scarlett to go through this Big Brother schedule and co-ordinate the last bits of paperwork. Gah! More like the last mountains of paperwork. The desk is piled high with endless reports and forms. And no cake? Just so wrong. Surely a little token of the Best Brownies Ever wouldn't go a miss.  Miss Scarlett brings out a card and a small gift for LBM's birthday which is from his birth mother.....his Tummy Mummy. I am surprised by my reaction. It's one of annoyance.  Her card is way bigger than ours and she has produced a gift. Humpf! But I remind myself that we are giving him the biggest and best gift ever.  She announces that Tummy Mummy has requested to meet with us. It takes a moment for this to sink in but I know this is the right thing to do for LBM. To tell him one day that we have all met and even have photos of us all together. We proceed...still no sign of any cake.... and the chairman is reading from one of these zillions of forms. Miss Delia catches my eye as I am frantically trying to appear as 'super organised mummy' whilst desperately trying to figure out which one of these zillions of pieces of paper we are supposed to be reading from. She smiles and whispers, "Don't worry, you don't have that form. That's her checklist." Phew, as that was getting pretty awkward as I was leering dead-casual-like over the chairman's shoulder. Awkward moment. Nowhere near as awkward as the moment we had in John Lewis yesterday. We were looking at pushchairs and came across one that had a coffee holder and fur-lined gloves attached. We both tried out the gloves, casually dismissing how impractical they were and clearly not waterproof! And the wheels were a bit stiff (hee hee...look at us being all super knowledgeable) Imagine our dismay when we discovered this was no shop model. This was in fact somebody's pushchair and in fact contained a baby. We could only imagine the look of horror on the mothers face as she watched us from afar. Needless to say, we were laughing so much, we had to leave. All I can say is that thank heavens LRUN didn't do his his usual trick of  "I will not be defeated.....I must figure out how this monstrosity folds down to a mear waif of it's it's original size!"

We spend the next week on holiday in a villa in the mountains of Andalucia. Our own little babymoon.  We have the most special time together. Enjoying those last opportunities of lying by the pool reading and drinking carafes of sweet sumptuous Sangria. I can't help think of how different this would be with a toddler in tow. Just the thought of airport security malarkey fills me with dread. But that's a whole 'nother adventure to look forward to.